by guest blogger Angela Chee
Life moves fast and we’re all busy. We have our work, our families, and responsibilities – then on top of that, keeping up with friends, our social networks, technology, our hobbies, and everything else. It can be exhausting.
One of my goals this year is to be more peaceful, more zen, if [...]
As a psychiatrist, I believe that dreams provide extraordinary insights into improving your health, relationships and career. I consult my dreams for all important decisions using a technique that I describe in “Emotional Freedom” and below. You’d be surprised by the invaluable advice that your dreams give, either spontaneously or on request.
Science magazine reports that sleeping on a problem, which results in “unconscious thought,” can lead to smarter decisions than over-thinking — especially when it comes to important choices. For instance, if you’re going crazy analyzing the pros and cons of a relationship, the Science study suggests that that won’t get you very far; rather, it proposes that you think less and sleep on the dilemma, to give your subconscious an opportunity to solve the problem.
I subscribe to the “sleep on it” school of decision-making, which involves drawing on the wisdom of dreams. Why do we dream? To find answers, resolve emotional conflicts and discharge negativity, as well as to stabilize our biochemistry and mood. However, to me, another interesting question is why we wake up. Native American and Aboriginal cultures revere dream-time over waking life; they base tribal law on information obtained there. The Maoris believe that when we die, we return to the dream world. Kalahari Bushmen say, “There is a dream, and it is dreaming us.” So, in your own life, your dreams can contain advice that goes beyond the Annals of Internal Medicine.
How To Remember And Interpret Your Dreams
I recommend the following 5 strategies to remember your dreams:
Try this every day for a week. Keep at it. You are programming your subconscious to remember. Soon it will become second nature to you.
How do you interpret dreams? One key is to notice the most highly charged emotion in the dream — for instance, anger, fear or joy. Next, ask yourself, “Where in my life am I feeling these emotions?” Then, consider how you can heal the situation or else celebrate a success. In addition, here are some common dreams and their interpretations.
A Guide To Interpreting Common Psychological Dreams (From Emotional Freedom)
Dreams About Your Fears, Anxieties and Insecurities:
Dreams Affirming Your Strengths, Emotional Achievements and Largeness of Spirit:
Dreams let you pinpoint an emotional conflict so that you can solve it. For instance, if you’re standing naked before a group of jeering co-workers, ask yourself, “Might I have feelings of being exposed or berated at work?” Then take steps to feel more protected in that environment. Or if, in a dream, you’re wandering aimlessly, consider, “Where am I lost in my life, and how can I find my way?” Also, it’s crucial to honor the messages of encouragement that dreams send. Emotional freedom comes from removing blocks as well as acknowledging your own clarity and power.
Read full post...
As a psychiatrist, I believe that dreams provide extraordinary insights into improving your health, relationships and career. I consult my dreams for all important decisions using a technique that I describe in “Emotional Freedom” and below. You’d be surprised by the invaluable advice that your dreams give, either spontaneously or on request.
Science magazine reports that sleeping on a problem, which results in “unconscious thought,” can lead to smarter decisions than over-thinking — especially when it comes to important choices. For instance, if you’re going crazy analyzing the pros and cons of a relationship, the Science study suggests that that won’t get you very far; rather, it proposes that you think less and sleep on the dilemma, to give your subconscious an opportunity to solve the problem.
I subscribe to the “sleep on it” school of decision-making, which involves drawing on the wisdom of dreams. Why do we dream? To find answers, resolve emotional conflicts and discharge negativity, as well as to stabilize our biochemistry and mood. However, to me, another interesting question is why we wake up. Native American and Aboriginal cultures revere dream-time over waking life; they base tribal law on information obtained there. The Maoris believe that when we die, we return to the dream world. Kalahari Bushmen say, “There is a dream, and it is dreaming us.” So, in your own life, your dreams can contain advice that goes beyond the Annals of Internal Medicine.
How To Remember And Interpret Your Dreams
I recommend the following 5 strategies to remember your dreams:
Try this every day for a week. Keep at it. You are programming your subconscious to remember. Soon it will become second nature to you.
How do you interpret dreams? One key is to notice the most highly charged emotion in the dream — for instance, anger, fear or joy. Next, ask yourself, “Where in my life am I feeling these emotions?” Then, consider how you can heal the situation or else celebrate a success. In addition, here are some common dreams and their interpretations.
A Guide To Interpreting Common Psychological Dreams (From Emotional Freedom)
Dreams About Your Fears, Anxieties and Insecurities:
Dreams Affirming Your Strengths, Emotional Achievements and Largeness of Spirit:
Dreams let you pinpoint an emotional conflict so that you can solve it. For instance, if you’re standing naked before a group of jeering co-workers, ask yourself, “Might I have feelings of being exposed or berated at work?” Then take steps to feel more protected in that environment. Or if, in a dream, you’re wandering aimlessly, consider, “Where am I lost in my life, and how can I find my way?” Also, it’s crucial to honor the messages of encouragement that dreams send. Emotional freedom comes from removing blocks as well as acknowledging your own clarity and power.
Read full post...
In my practice as a psychiatrist and in my personal life, I’ve known many people whom I call “emotional gushers.” Gushers are experts at knowing their emotions and were born to share them. No one has to wonder where they’re at. Elated, bored, miserable, they tell you. What you see is what you get. They tend to be spontaneous, direct, authentic and trusted confidants. The gusher unloads stress by verbalizing it.
I, for one, know how freeing this can be. I am grateful to my treasured circle of friends, who deserve trophies for listening to my fears, hopes and quandaries over the years. However, some gushers get antsy when there’s no one to tell. Also, they may resist making independent decisions, trusting their intuition or staying emotionally grounded without external input. I have a patient who’s an aide in a convalescent home, a true friend to the elderly. Though he finds helping others gratifying, the setting can be arduous: understaffing and budget cuts compromise the care he gives to the dementia-afflicted or physically disabled, a brutal neglect he had difficulty stomaching. Each night, he depended on being able to vent his stress to his wife and could work himself into tremendous anxiety if she wasn’t around. My patient didn’t know how else to calm down and release stress until I taught him the techniques in this article. In addition to healthily venting, he learned to tap the power within to find inner peace.
In my book “Emotional Freedom” I describe the gusher as well as three other common emotional types, which include the Intellectual, the Empath and the Rock. It’s important to know which type you are to be empowered emotionally. To determine if you’re a gusher, take the following quiz.
Quiz: Am I A Gusher?
Ask yourself:
If you answer “yes” to one to three of these questions, you possess some gusher tendencies. Responding “yes” to more than three suggests that this is your emotional type.
Recognizing that you’re a gusher enables you to become a better communicator by learning to balance self-sufficiency with emotional expression. Sometimes gushers are so hungry to share that they turn people off. At a party, in the market, they’re all over you, compulsive emotional purgers. (The joke goes that such motormouths qualify for the Twelve-Step Program On-and-on-and-on-and-on!) Although it’s liberating to voice feelings, a gusher must strike a balance between healthily emoting and drawing on the wisdom within. Consider the following profile summarizing a gusher’s traits.
The Gusher’s Upside
The Gusher’s Downside.
Emotional Action Step: Tips For Gushers To Find Balance
Empower yourself with self-sufficiency. Experiment with centering your feelings before soliciting support. Here’s how: First define the upset. Let’s say your boss has made mince meat out of your self-worth yet again. Second, ask yourself, “How does this make me feel? Seething? Demoralized? Plotting murder?” Now let yourself experience those emotions uncut, not acting them out, an essential stage before transformation can happen. Third, work with your feelings using these techniques:
As a gusher, if you skip these steps and go straight to the phone, you’ll cheat yourself out of the opportunity to build the emotional muscles necessary for more freedom and autonomy. Knowledge is power. The most important relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself. If this is good, you’ll be capable of gratifying relationships with others.
Read full post...
In my practice as a psychiatrist and in my personal life, I’ve known many people whom I call “emotional gushers.” Gushers are experts at knowing their emotions and were born to share them. No one has to wonder where they’re at. Elated, bored, miserable, they tell you. What you see is what you get. They tend to be spontaneous, direct, authentic and trusted confidants. The gusher unloads stress by verbalizing it.
I, for one, know how freeing this can be. I am grateful to my treasured circle of friends, who deserve trophies for listening to my fears, hopes and quandaries over the years. However, some gushers get antsy when there’s no one to tell. Also, they may resist making independent decisions, trusting their intuition or staying emotionally grounded without external input. I have a patient who’s an aide in a convalescent home, a true friend to the elderly. Though he finds helping others gratifying, the setting can be arduous: understaffing and budget cuts compromise the care he gives to the dementia-afflicted or physically disabled, a brutal neglect he had difficulty stomaching. Each night, he depended on being able to vent his stress to his wife and could work himself into tremendous anxiety if she wasn’t around. My patient didn’t know how else to calm down and release stress until I taught him the techniques in this article. In addition to healthily venting, he learned to tap the power within to find inner peace.
In my book “Emotional Freedom” I describe the gusher as well as three other common emotional types, which include the Intellectual, the Empath and the Rock. It’s important to know which type you are to be empowered emotionally. To determine if you’re a gusher, take the following quiz.
Quiz: Am I A Gusher?
Ask yourself:
If you answer “yes” to one to three of these questions, you possess some gusher tendencies. Responding “yes” to more than three suggests that this is your emotional type.
Recognizing that you’re a gusher enables you to become a better communicator by learning to balance self-sufficiency with emotional expression. Sometimes gushers are so hungry to share that they turn people off. At a party, in the market, they’re all over you, compulsive emotional purgers. (The joke goes that such motormouths qualify for the Twelve-Step Program On-and-on-and-on-and-on!) Although it’s liberating to voice feelings, a gusher must strike a balance between healthily emoting and drawing on the wisdom within. Consider the following profile summarizing a gusher’s traits.
The Gusher’s Upside
The Gusher’s Downside.
Emotional Action Step: Tips For Gushers To Find Balance
Empower yourself with self-sufficiency. Experiment with centering your feelings before soliciting support. Here’s how: First define the upset. Let’s say your boss has made mince meat out of your self-worth yet again. Second, ask yourself, “How does this make me feel? Seething? Demoralized? Plotting murder?” Now let yourself experience those emotions uncut, not acting them out, an essential stage before transformation can happen. Third, work with your feelings using these techniques:
As a gusher, if you skip these steps and go straight to the phone, you’ll cheat yourself out of the opportunity to build the emotional muscles necessary for more freedom and autonomy. Knowledge is power. The most important relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself. If this is good, you’ll be capable of gratifying relationships with others.
Read full post...
In my book “Emotional Freedom,” I emphasize the importance of learning how to stay centered in a stressful, highly emotionally charged world. Since research has shown that emotions can be contagious, you can potentially “catch” fear, anger, or joy from people without realizing it. If you tend to be an emotional sponge, it’s vital to know how to avoid taking on an individual’s negative emotions or the free-floating kind in crowds. Another twist is that chronic anxiety, depression, or stress can turn you into an emotional sponge by wearing down your defenses. Suddenly, you become hyper-attuned to others, especially those with similar pain. That’s how empathy works; we zero in on hot-button issues that are unresolved in ourselves. Negative emotions can originate from several sources. What you’re feeling may be your own; it may be someone else’s; or it may be a combination. I’ll explain how to tell the difference and strategically bolster positive emotions so you don’t shoulder negativity that doesn’t belong to you.
This wasn’t something I always knew how to do. Growing up, my girlfriends couldn’t wait to hit the shopping malls and go to parties, the bigger the better–but I didn’t share their excitement. I always felt overwhelmed, exhausted around large groups of people, though I was clueless why. “What’s the matter with you?” friends would say, shooting me the weirdest looks. All I knew was that crowded places and I just didn’t mix. I’d go there feeling just fine but leave nervous, depressed, or with some horrible new ache or pain. Unsuspectingly, I was a sponge, sensing the emotions of people around me.
With my patients, I’ve also seen how absorbing other people’s emotions can trigger panic attacks, depression, food, sex and drug binges, and a plethora of physical symptoms that defy traditional medical diagnosis. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report that more than two million Americans suffer from chronic fatigue. It’s likely that many of them are emotional sponges.
Here are some strategies from “Emotional Freedom” to practice. They will help you to stop taking on other people’s stress.
Emotional Action Step: 6 Tips To Stay Centered In A Stressful World
To detach from other people’s negative emotions:
Tip #1: First, ask yourself: Is the feeling mine or someone else’s? It could be both. If the emotion such as fear or anger is yours, gently confront what’s causing it on your own or with professional help. If not, try to pinpoint the obvious generator. For instance, if you’ve just watched a comedy, yet you came home from the movie theater feeling blue, you may have incorporated the depression of the people sitting beside you; in close proximity, energy fields overlap. The same is true with going to a mall or packed concert.
Tip #2: When possible, distance yourself from the suspected source. Move at least twenty feet away; see if you feel relief. Don’t err on the side of not wanting to offend strangers. In a public place, don’t hesitate to change seats if you feel a sense of depression imposing on you.
Tip #3: For a few minutes, center yourself by concentrating on your breath: This connects you to your essence. Keep exhaling stress inhaling calm. This helps to ground yourself and purify fear or other difficult emotions. Visualize stress as gray fog lifting from your body, and hope as a clear light entering. This can yield quick results.
Tip #4: Stressful emotions such as fear frequently lodge in your gut. Place your palm there as you keep sending loving-kindness to that area to soothe stress. For longstanding depression or anxiety, use this method daily to strengthen yourself. It’s comforting and builds a sense of safety and optimism.
Tip #5: Visualize. A handy form of protection many people use, including health care practitioners with trying patients, involves visualizing an envelope of white light around your entire body. Think of it as a shield that blocks out negativity or physical discomfort but allows what’s positive to filter in.
Tip #6: Look for positive people and situations. Call a friend who sees the good in others. Spend time with a colleague who affirms the bright side of things. Listen to hopeful people. Hear the faith they have in themselves and others. Also relish hopeful words, songs, and art forms. Hope is contagious and it will lift your mood.
Keep practicing these strategies. You don’t have to reinvent the wheel each time you’re on emotional overload. With strategies to cope, you can have quicker retorts to stressful situations, feel safer, and your sensitivities can blossom.
Read full post...
If you want to see what your body will look like tomorrow, look at your thoughts today.
–Navajo saying
Your body is programmed for survival. Heeding early warnings protects your health. Familiarize yourself with how your body speaks to you. It wants you to be well. It will tell you if you are not. Hippocrates wrote over two thousand years ago, “There is a measure of conscious thought throughout the body.” This is practical wisdom you can live by.
In my book “Dr. Orloff’s Guide to Intuitive Healing” I describe how your body is a richly nuanced intuitive receiver—and how you must be aware your body’s signals to completely heal. This may require some adjustment of how you think about health. As a physician, I’ve seen that many people are trained to function from the neck up denying the rest of their bodies. I want you to re-orient yourself, to respect the intellect, but attend to your body’s messages as well. Being aware of the body can open intuition because you’re focusing on your physicality, getting out of your head and into your sensual awareness. This may mean noticing the early signs of pain so you can act on them, trusting your gut about relationships, or awakening your sexuality. We can’t afford to ignore life-informing signals your body sends.
It’s vital to re-train yourself to override mechanisms you’ve developed to push through discomfort. To prevent illness I’m going to show you how to pay special attention to physical distress signals. Honor your body’s messages; don’t discount them. Simple prompt action is sometimes all it takes. If you’re tired, rest. If you’re hungry, eat a delicious meal. If you’re stressed, get a relaxing massage. The price of not listening? You come down with the flu; your back goes out. You still don’t listen? Chest pain. Ulcers. Depression. The thermostat gets turned up until you pay attention.
To listen to your body and get a headstart on warding off symptoms get used to detecting the quieter messages your body sends. It’s important to listen to what your gut says, whether it’s tied up in knots or relaxed– this intuition can inform all your decisions by pointing you to people and situations you’re comfortable with. Also notice your energy level around people. Does it go up or down? Your body picks up on this quickly. Try to surround yourself with positive people. This will improve your health and wellbeing. Here are some signals your body sends if it’s out of balance. Some of them you may recognize right away.
5 WARNING SIGNS YOUR BODY SENDS (from “Dr. Orloff’s Guide to Intuitive Healing”)
If you answer “yes” to any of these questions it’s worthwhile to begin by taking a general inventory of your health and stress level. What areas can be improved upon? Examine everything from the amount of exercise to alone time to your relationships. Make sure you’re allotting enough space to recharge. Though the above changes may seen relatively minor, on an intuitive level they indicate early difficulty. To start, do your best to pinpoint and remedy problem areas.
To detect your body’s warnings, both quiet and loud, requires increasing your sensitivity to the nuances of its messages. The art of listening entails sensing smaller symptoms before they become full blown. Mindfulness is key. Denial is the antithesis of intuition. We must do what we can to get past it. As a physician, I’ve seen time and again how increasing body awareness facilitates prevention of illness and more vibrant health. Listening to your body is a powerful step towards self-care that benefits wellness in all areas.
Read full post...
(Adapted from “Guide to Intuitive Healing: Five Steps to Physical, Emotional, and Sexual Wellness by Judith Orloff MD)
I want to guide you through the process of selecting a health care practitioner to match your needs. I’ll point out qualities to look for and those to avoid. Here are some guidelines to follow. Also use common sense combined with intuition to choose the right practitioner for you. Who you let touch your body, prescribe medications, and counsel you about vital health strategies is one of the most important decisions you’ll ever make.
In Guide to Intuitive Healing I discuss in detail the do’s and don’ts when evaluating or looking for a doctor. Many of us have stuck far too long with a health care practitioner when we didn’t follow our intuition on whether they were a good fit for our needs. Seek out someone who blends intuitive and technical skills implementing as many of the following guidelines from my book as possible.
QUALITIES TO LOOK FOR
Notice if your doctor:
QUALITIES TO AVOID
Notice if your doctor:
It is your right to access who is the right health care practitioner for you. Taking responsibility for your choice by evaluating the above criteria will lead to a more positive and productive relationship with your doctor. The care and time you give to finding the right health care practitioner is very empowering. It allows you to become an integral part of your healing process. When you and your doctor are on the same wavelength, communication about all aspects of your health will be vastly improved.
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In my book “Emotional Freedom,” I emphasize the importance of learning how to stay centered in a stressful, highly emotionally charged world. Since research has shown that emotions can be contagious, you can potentially “catch” fear, anger, or joy from people without realizing it. If you tend to be an emotional sponge, it’s vital to know how to avoid taking on an individual’s negative emotions or the free-floating kind in crowds. Another twist is that chronic anxiety, depression, or stress can turn you into an emotional sponge by wearing down your defenses. Suddenly, you become hyper-attuned to others, especially those with similar pain. That’s how empathy works; we zero in on hot-button issues that are unresolved in ourselves. Negative emotions can originate from several sources. What you’re feeling may be your own; it may be someone else’s; or it may be a combination. I’ll explain how to tell the difference and strategically bolster positive emotions so you don’t shoulder negativity that doesn’t belong to you.
This wasn’t something I always knew how to do. Growing up, my girlfriends couldn’t wait to hit the shopping malls and go to parties, the bigger the better–but I didn’t share their excitement. I always felt overwhelmed, exhausted around large groups of people, though I was clueless why. “What’s the matter with you?” friends would say, shooting me the weirdest looks. All I knew was that crowded places and I just didn’t mix. I’d go there feeling just fine but leave nervous, depressed, or with some horrible new ache or pain. Unsuspectingly, I was a sponge, sensing the emotions of people around me.
With my patients, I’ve also seen how absorbing other people’s emotions can trigger panic attacks, depression, food, sex and drug binges, and a plethora of physical symptoms that defy traditional medical diagnosis. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report that more than two million Americans suffer from chronic fatigue. It’s likely that many of them are emotional sponges.
Here are some strategies from “Emotional Freedom” to practice. They will help you to stop taking on other people’s stress.
Emotional Action Step: 6 Tips To Stay Centered In A Stressful World
To detach from other people’s negative emotions:
Tip #1: First, ask yourself: Is the feeling mine or someone else’s? It could be both. If the emotion such as fear or anger is yours, gently confront what’s causing it on your own or with professional help. If not, try to pinpoint the obvious generator. For instance, if you’ve just watched a comedy, yet you came home from the movie theater feeling blue, you may have incorporated the depression of the people sitting beside you; in close proximity, energy fields overlap. The same is true with going to a mall or packed concert.
Tip #2: When possible, distance yourself from the suspected source. Move at least twenty feet away; see if you feel relief. Don’t err on the side of not wanting to offend strangers. In a public place, don’t hesitate to change seats if you feel a sense of depression imposing on you.
Tip #3: For a few minutes, center yourself by concentrating on your breath: This connects you to your essence. Keep exhaling stress inhaling calm. This helps to ground yourself and purify fear or other difficult emotions. Visualize stress as gray fog lifting from your body, and hope as a clear light entering. This can yield quick results.
Tip #4: Stressful emotions such as fear frequently lodge in your gut. Place your palm there as you keep sending loving-kindness to that area to soothe stress. For longstanding depression or anxiety, use this method daily to strengthen yourself. It’s comforting and builds a sense of safety and optimism.
Tip #5: Visualize. A handy form of protection many people use, including health care practitioners with trying patients, involves visualizing an envelope of white light around your entire body. Think of it as a shield that blocks out negativity or physical discomfort but allows what’s positive to filter in.
Tip #6: Look for positive people and situations. Call a friend who sees the good in others. Spend time with a colleague who affirms the bright side of things. Listen to hopeful people. Hear the faith they have in themselves and others. Also relish hopeful words, songs, and art forms. Hope is contagious and it will lift your mood.
Keep practicing these strategies. You don’t have to reinvent the wheel each time you’re on emotional overload. With strategies to cope, you can have quicker retorts to stressful situations, feel safer, and your sensitivities can blossom.
Read full post...
If you want to see what your body will look like tomorrow, look at your thoughts today.
–Navajo saying
Your body is programmed for survival. Heeding early warnings protects your health. Familiarize yourself with how your body speaks to you. It wants you to be well. It will tell you if you are not. Hippocrates wrote over two thousand years ago, “There is a measure of conscious thought throughout the body.” This is practical wisdom you can live by.
In my book “Dr. Orloff’s Guide to Intuitive Healing” I describe how your body is a richly nuanced intuitive receiver—and how you must be aware your body’s signals to completely heal. This may require some adjustment of how you think about health. As a physician, I’ve seen that many people are trained to function from the neck up denying the rest of their bodies. I want you to re-orient yourself, to respect the intellect, but attend to your body’s messages as well. Being aware of the body can open intuition because you’re focusing on your physicality, getting out of your head and into your sensual awareness. This may mean noticing the early signs of pain so you can act on them, trusting your gut about relationships, or awakening your sexuality. We can’t afford to ignore life-informing signals your body sends.
It’s vital to re-train yourself to override mechanisms you’ve developed to push through discomfort. To prevent illness I’m going to show you how to pay special attention to physical distress signals. Honor your body’s messages; don’t discount them. Simple prompt action is sometimes all it takes. If you’re tired, rest. If you’re hungry, eat a delicious meal. If you’re stressed, get a relaxing massage. The price of not listening? You come down with the flu; your back goes out. You still don’t listen? Chest pain. Ulcers. Depression. The thermostat gets turned up until you pay attention.
To listen to your body and get a headstart on warding off symptoms get used to detecting the quieter messages your body sends. It’s important to listen to what your gut says, whether it’s tied up in knots or relaxed– this intuition can inform all your decisions by pointing you to people and situations you’re comfortable with. Also notice your energy level around people. Does it go up or down? Your body picks up on this quickly. Try to surround yourself with positive people. This will improve your health and wellbeing. Here are some signals your body sends if it’s out of balance. Some of them you may recognize right away.
5 WARNING SIGNS YOUR BODY SENDS (from “Dr. Orloff’s Guide to Intuitive Healing”)
If you answer “yes” to any of these questions it’s worthwhile to begin by taking a general inventory of your health and stress level. What areas can be improved upon? Examine everything from the amount of exercise to alone time to your relationships. Make sure you’re allotting enough space to recharge. Though the above changes may seen relatively minor, on an intuitive level they indicate early difficulty. To start, do your best to pinpoint and remedy problem areas.
To detect your body’s warnings, both quiet and loud, requires increasing your sensitivity to the nuances of its messages. The art of listening entails sensing smaller symptoms before they become full blown. Mindfulness is key. Denial is the antithesis of intuition. We must do what we can to get past it. As a physician, I’ve seen time and again how increasing body awareness facilitates prevention of illness and more vibrant health. Listening to your body is a powerful step towards self-care that benefits wellness in all areas.
Read full post...